Life

The art of saying ‘I’m Just Not That Into You’

Dating can be such an amazing experience. The thrill of meeting a person for the first time, a first kiss, cracking a joke and having the other person laugh slightly louder than usual… these are all things that make our knees weak and pin our hearts to our sleeves. The first few months of a new relationship for most people can be a magical time. You’re getting to know someone inside and out – their quirks, what makes them tick and most importantly if they are somewhat compatible as a partner. I’ve had my fair share of dates …with each one more interesting than the next.

I met a guy a while back on probably what is one of the most popular, yet  sleaziest of online dating platforms. You guessed it –  the ole Tindy. He was charming, good looking, funny and appeared to have his head on his shoulders. I grew to like him more as I spent spent time with him. Things were going well for a while. Baseball games, dinners out, late night movies… you get the drill. I thought nothing of it when I didn’t receive a text or a call from him knowing full well he was not a big phone guy.

It was only after a week where I had reached out several times when I figured something was up. Sheepishly, I tried connecting thinking I could maybe get him on the phone for a quick conversation to rectify why the sudden silence. Unfortunately as I had expected – no answer. I then figured I would be more direct because what can go wrong when you ask for what you want? I’m not a game player especially when it comes to mind games with the opposite sex. I’m fast approaching 30 and I know what I want when it comes a partner. It’s as simple as that.

I sent the text off hoping that his phone was at the bottom of a lake. To my surprise, it was delivered – I never heard from him ever again.

Twas' a Ghosting...

Twas’ a Ghosting…

Now I get going on a few dates and not hearing from the person ever again. I think we’re all guilty of that. But a few months of dating someone and then to be completely ‘ghosted’ is a whole other level of rudeness.

Did I say something wrong?
Did he meet someone else?
Did he lose his phone? I bet someone stole his phone!
Did I scare him off some how?
Was my singing that bad?
Maybe I gave him food poisoning when he was over for dinner?
I bet my dogs were too much to handle.
Is he dead?

The simple answer is that this person was too much of a coward to be honest and say – “Look Erin – I’m just not that into you.” Although disappointed with a slight bout’ of rejection, this is something – the truth – I could’ve full well handled. Women living in today’s world are much more resilient than men seem to think. I’m sure this guy is a nice person deep down. At least I thought so while we were dating. But the fact that he dropped off the face of the earth was mean and just plain rude, proved otherwise. The least I deserved was a simple clarification on where we stood especially after asking.

Yup.

Yup.

 

 Lesson: Not everyone is as they seem. 

 

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